Work through the section in black and pick out a maximum of three things you think need to be changed. Type your corrections in a comment below, using CAPITALS for your changes, and explain why you think they need to be corrected. Allow at least one other person to post a comment before you look for more alterations.
Remember, there usually isn't only one way to say a thing. You may disagree with others, and that's fine. Just enter your own thoughts--a maximum of three at a time (so that others have a chance too).0
N.B. If you spot something that needs changing in the blue section, you need to go back to the previous posts as they may well have already been picked up. Only cover the black words in this post.
THE UPSIDE-DOWN TREE
Remember, there usually isn't only one way to say a thing. You may disagree with others, and that's fine. Just enter your own thoughts--a maximum of three at a time (so that others have a chance too).0
N.B. If you spot something that needs changing in the blue section, you need to go back to the previous posts as they may well have already been picked up. Only cover the black words in this post.
THE UPSIDE-DOWN TREE
SCRIPTURE
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THOUGHT FOR THE DAY: . . . they drew Jason and certain brothers before the city judges, crying, These who have turned the world upside down have come here too.
Acts 17:6 (KJV)
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As I drove along the road through the Limpopo Province of South Africa, I stopped the car to gaze with my eyes at the mighty baobab tree standing alongside the road. I knew that in the South African wet rainy season, this tree would give bountiful shade to both animals and humans alike as well as it would be providing food, water and shelter. Yet right then, in the dry air of the desert winter, it had lost all its foliage. It's head and arms appeared to be buried under the sand. Its spreading branches resembled fibrous roots as they reached out to the sky above. This had earned it the descriptive nickname, "The Upside-Down Tree." A number of African legends seek to explain the reason why this big tree appears to grow this way.
Early Christians were referred in their day as those "who turned the world upside down" because they made such a noticeable impact on people. I wonder if that could be said of us Christians today? Do people see us as different to them? Do we have a noticeable impact on those around us? Or are we so like everyone else they don't see any difference? Over forty years ago in the past, someone succeeded in turning my life upside down when they introduced me to Jesus Christ. Through the years, I have been privileged to lead others into Christ. Yet I am surrounded by people who need to have their lives turned upside down-or would that be right way up?
Personally, I am in completely uncharted waters here, but let me try:
ReplyDelete- Over forty years ago in the past...remove "in the past"...over forty years ago already implies past tense?
- I have been privileged to...by whom?? Replace with...I HAD THE PRIVILEGE TO.
- into...seems wrong to lead someone into someone else, replace with...lead others TO Christ...
(I don't know all the technical terms to justify my corrections, especially on the third one, but I hope I did well enough for a beginner? Beginner's grin attached.)
Well done for tackling this, Sue. This is one of the best ways of learning to write that I know of. It's always easier to spot mistakes in another person's writing.
ReplyDelete1) Yes, of course "in the past" is redundant so delete it.
2) You're right about "the word privileged, although the final write-up was slightly different to your suggestion (see post still to follow).
3) Into - absolutely. S/B to
4) Beginner's grin deserved. Well done.
One small punctuation issue - 'upside down-or would that be right way up?' We need an en-rule (don't know how to do it here) with spaces around it. (Though not if it's for the US - they use an em-rule that is closed up.)
ReplyDelete